Ham-mimah

2010-08-25T11:53:00.002+08:00

On hiatus here. find me at my tumblr. http://hammy-mah.tumblr.com. Be back after the exams lovelies.

2010-08-20T16:36:00.000+08:00

2010-08-18T12:15:00.002+08:00

i miss this. :(

its been awhile. dont think i will be updating much these days. exams are around the corner and i have yet to sit down and study my hearts out. gotta start the momentum before its too late. anyways, i experienced a temporary loss of weight for the first few days of fasting. was telling syahid the other day, if i can lose 2kg in 4days, by the time i complete 1 month of fasting, i will look like a complete anorexic girl! haha. but thats why i say 'temporary' loss of weight. wait till raya comes. double the size, double the nice. ;)

i finally satisfy my cravings for murtabak yesterday evening when syahid brought me to zam zam to break our fast. and they were giving free kathira drinks and dates. (even though their dates look so phatetic) mama is making more kueh tat today since her friend is coming over to help. yummy. :D these are parts of ramadhan i love the most. baking of kuehs, breaking fast as a family and with friends be it outside or at the comfort of your own home, shopping for raya neccesities and also, listening to hari raya songs being played on the radio. weeeeeeeeeeeee!

2010-08-14T10:43:00.002+08:00

Having to witness a delivery yesterday morning i realise that giving birth is not a matter of buying and selling nor trading. Its a matter of fighting between life and death of 2 souls. A mother struggling for her own and for her baby to be introduced into the world. The joy of hearing your own baby’s first cry and a proud daddy who had his first touch of being of his own blood, it was just overwhelming. I had no control but to drop a tear or two. But as i stood there watching with blood endlessly gushing from the mother’s wound, my world suddenly took a spin around me. My throat became so tight and cold sweats start trickling down my forehead. At that instance, i knew i couldn’t take it any longer. I decided to take a break from the scene and get hold of myself outside.

Nonetheless, it was such a great once in a lifetime experience for me. (:

2010-08-11T21:27:00.002+08:00

i survived the first day of fasting. yay. not so much of a big deal actually. was just feeling a little too tired and sleepy after work today. headed to bed the moment i reached home. with the nice weather outside and my limbs still kinda frozen from the air con at work and throughout the way home, i never felt so good hugging my bolster and having my favourite blanket covering me to sleep. i wouldnt have woke up on time for break-fast if not for syahid's call. by the time i woke up, it was already 7pm. perangai macam ______. haha. my mum was so nice not to wake me up to help her out in the kitchen. she knew i was too exhausted to even open my eyes.

i'm enjoying every single bit of my posting now. was posted to the nursery today and oh mee gosh! there were so many babies! i bathe them babies, fed them, change their diapers and time flies when you're in the nursery. now i cant wait to have one of my own. :DDD but my mum told me this, "wait till you're posted to the labour ward, you will think twice of having a baby" :O and i'm going there on friday. i hope there'll be some cases there. or else i will froze to boredom in that chilly labour ward.

i shall turn in early tonight cos tmr will be another day. (:

2010-08-06T21:19:00.003+08:00

i came to school for the sake of sitting in for pharmaco tutorial. i already missed health psycho's tutorial an hour earlier since i was too lazy to get ready for school. was lazing around in bed contemplating with syahid if i should go to school or not. but since theres this makan makan session with out mentor, ms rosy in the afternoon, i made up my mind to get my ass to school. and little did i know, the class actually got for me a cake for my (belated) birthday. awwwww. :) how sweeeeeeeeeet. and look at what they did to me in that picture above. haha. thank you NR0918, much love. (: i should've just brought my camera mann. its the last day of school! before more attachments and exams that is. -___- its already the end of semester 1. how fast time flies.

went for a karaoke session with shahidah and syahid in the evening with ina joining us soon after. sumpah i have to listen to more malay songs. half the time, i was clueless on what songs they were singing. videos will be uploaded at facebook. you can see how syahid melalak-lalak like what like that. and the connection iz getting on my nerves i tell youuuuuuuuuuuu. zzzzzzzz

2010-08-05T21:59:00.004+08:00

Thank you for all the 100 over birthday wishes over at my wall at facebook, never ending birthday SMS-es and also to nadirah and saif who made the effort to sing me a birthday song over the phone. even though they had to leave me several miss calls before i got back to them cos i was out having dinner. Even though it was just like any other day, i'm satisfied i get to spend this day with loved ones. "A year Older, A year Wiser" 18 is just a number, you dont get to change overnight like some superhero movie. and yes, even though its hard, i realise who my true friends are. maybe i'm too forgiving, or maybe i just dont see myself as getting hurt over and over again in silence. i shall not touch that now to ruin the end of my day. once again, thank you all. (:

2010-08-02T21:02:00.001+08:00

Would you tremble if I touched your lips?

Would you laugh oh please tell me these

Now would you die for the one you love?

Hold me in your arms tonight?

2010-07-30T19:30:00.000+08:00

"it's like a missing star

that's always been up in your sky

it's like the rainbow never comes after the rain

it's like the sun never rises in every of your mornings"

2010-07-29T20:30:00.004+08:00

I remember this one time, we made plans to go to the gym. you were on your way and you called to tell me you forgot to bring your gym shoes. i was so mad but since we both were already on our way, theres nothing much we can do about it. but you, knowing how i would sulk cos i think the idea of running those treadmills alone stinks, went all the way back home without telling me just to get your pair of shoes. when i called demanding to know why you took so long to reach, you told me you're in the cab from home, on the way to meet me. i felt so damn guilty at that point of time. we met, you didnt give me the "i did this all for you look and you have to appreciate me" look. instead, you just planted a kiss on my cheek and bring me to get some food cos you didnt want me to starve. (:

i remember when i had one of those rough times, i couldnt sleep almost the whole night. you were so concerned, you accompanied me on the phone and when i cried so badly, you cried along with me. that just show how much you feel me. you didnt ask me me to stop talking, instead, you listen to me the whole night. i wanted to meet you the next day so badly. even though you had school, you came all the way down to YCK to meet me. you asked if i felt alot better and gave me a warm hug. i cried some more on your shoulder and you wiped away my tears with your bare fingers and told me its going to be alright. spending time with you that day, you made me laugh, you made me smile, you made me forget the problems i was facing for awhile.

i remember when you were still working. i didnt like you being in that company (i shall not mention any names) cos you were always home late. there was one time when i got so mad and didnt allow you to have supper with your colleagues. and when i'm mad, you know my ways. i'll switch of my phone and go to sleep. soon, i hear the home phone ringing. my mum picked it up and you told my mum to inform me that you're on your way home and cancelled the plans with your colleagues. my mum told you i was already asleep. but truth is, i wasnt.

i remember when we had one of those arguements over the phone bout silly little things. as usual, i always want to put down the phone but you wont give up trying to get back to me. your persistence pissed me even more and we ended up shouting and screaming at each other. my house was undergoing a little construction and it was messy and dusty everywhere. knowing that i had to clean my house alone since my parents was away, you came over and without saying much, you vacuumed and mopped the floor, wipe and rearrange back the furnitures with me. and again, you kissed me and whispered to my ear how sorry you were.

Theres no words to describe how much you care for me, all those effort to keep this relationship going, all those times you put up with my attitude. i would like to say thank you, my love. Happy 13th. (:

2010-07-26T21:08:00.002+08:00

"Love is about bout the moment. And moment never last.

That moment blinds you and screws up your mind which stops you from thinking straight.

They leave pain in your fragile heart and pushes tears of anguish out of your eyes.

They will become memories of yesterday, but the pain & torment remains forever in your heart"

Like a scar that never disappear.

2010-07-25T21:27:00.002+08:00

its been exactly a week since i last updated here. been busy with attachments and now that attachments are done, school is taking over. dont think i will be a little less busy with projects and assignments and exams coming up. oh my oh my. and there'll be another atachment in no time soon.

anyways, its raining cats and dogs now and i'm loving it. the breeze coming through the window is making me sleepy. but i still have some statistics project to finish up. dateline in 1 week's time! :(

my weekend was spent with syahid and his family. if you see the pictures uploaded at facebook, i had a nice time shopping for materials like cloth, zip and sponges for the sewing stuff. i'll update you guys when the sample is ready. first sample will be a laptop bag. if you think you need a laptop bag, let me know. you can customize the bag yourself and have your own name embroided on in. :D just wait and see! we went around geylang and stop at this shop that was selling malay traditional outfits. their design really took be aback. their price too. FUUhhh! but the design and embroidery just shows it all. worth the value i must say. so i was told to try a $470 baju kurung out and this syahid took have to take my picture while everyone else stood there staring. so embarassing. and it didnt end there. went to tanjong katong complex and tried out a green kebaya this time. fall in love with it the moment i laid my eyes on that peice. $330. hmmmm. i'll have to convince my mum a little harder. haha.

so today, early in the morning already syahid's parent drove me to kembangan to get my madrasah book. so nice of them to come all the way to amk just to fetch me. headed to simei after that with syahid since he wanted to get his stuff. met shahidah after that for out hair treatment all the way at clementi.

Hohoho. school start at 8am tmr. zzzzzzzz. whatever. at least i dont ahve to wake up at 5 now and get out of the house an hour earlier everyday since NYP is just 10 minutes away. muahahaha. a part of me dread going back to school but the other part of me cant wait to start this rusty engine rolling again. its been sometime since i do some revision. :o

2010-07-18T20:54:00.003+08:00

"i'm calculating whats left inside me

when everything i left were my life and my dreams

and everytime you were proud of what you were not

this is the truth and it'll be a history"

2010-07-13T21:50:00.001+08:00

ho ho ho. i look much much older now with my new specs. :O

but whatever. i dont care with the term 'old' anymore.

2010-07-11T15:11:00.002+08:00

heh heh heh. i know syahid is gonna laugh when he see this. he was making a joke of how i'm gonna wear baju kurung and jubah to madrasah as if its hari raya tmr. -___- so that was taken during madrasah today. no more ugly uniform, yayy. gonna shop for more decent clothings, double yayy. i'm so hungry right now. and i'm waiting for my favourite fried kuay teow. my dad and udin is taking too long. i finally made a new specs thanks to my dad. heheh. just a simple black frame lah. nothing fancy. i'm all prepared to look 10 years older now. i dont care. :D

Hey makcikkk! this sunday dont forget madrasah okay! <3 youu!

2010-07-10T22:26:00.001+08:00

yaaaaaaaaaaaaa. omg. i didnt know it started last week! hahahaha. but yes ahh, we dont have to wear that ugly uniform anymore. :D see you tmr babe.

Ask me anything

2010-07-10T08:38:00.003+08:00

as i lie awake on my bed that night with the rain pouring outside, 1001 thoughts filtered through my head draining every inch of energy from this tired soul. tears flowed ever so freely leaving a wet spot on my pillow. in that state when my mind goes wild wondering of all sorts, that everything seems to be tumbling down, crashing on me, i realise how much of a dreamer i am. Afraid of my own expectations, fearing of the outcome. i know i can never be alone, i never want to be alone. i tried shutting my eyes again but this time i see you. you, why are you appearing in my mind again? you held me so tight and for once i felt so secure, so sure nothing is ever going to change. but i dont want to wake up to realise its just another dream. i open my eyes and all i hear was the snore of my little brother. How can everyone else sleeps peacefully when i'm having a war with my own thoughts? As i toss and turn, tears came flowing down again. Thats when she came into the room. she must have heard all those sniffs. she knew it wasnt a case of another flu, she knew i couldnt sleep despite the exhaustion i've been through all week. as she pulled the blanket over my shoulder, i cried even harder. without asking me why i'm still not asleep, she planted a kiss on my cheek, stroking my hair and told me to be strong. that everything is going to be alright. i woke up this morning and realise, it wasnt a dream at all.

2010-07-08T20:23:00.004+08:00

i might probably just had the worst morning so far since the start of attachment. was on the afternoon shift yesterday and morning shift for today. something that most of us would dread. imagine getting home so drained out from your energy and still had to wake up as early as 5am for the next working day. i had this feeling i couldnt wake up on time so i asked syahid to give me a morning call like how he usually does. little did i know that i woke up more than an hour later! yes, according to this dear boy here, he woke up late too for his water parade in the morning and only manage to get back around 6.10am to give me a call and check if i'm already awake. apparently, my alarm didnt work on me this time and i was so stunned to see the time i woke up this morning. for a few seconds, i just stare at the clock, stoning and hoping it was just a dream or i read my timetable wrongly and i was suppose to be on the afternoon shift again. hah. how i wish.

i SWEAR i broke my record of getting myself ready. can you believe it? i got out of the house by 10minutes! wow. luckily i got everything ready by last night. all i need to do was just shower and put on my uniform. but hey, judging from the normal time i took to get ready, who would've thought i would be able to rush the hell out of the house in 10minutes! with no breakfast and no makeups and my hair untied, i ran after the bus and manage to get to the ward just on time. pheww! pheww! pheww! the looks the other passengers on the bus gave can kill mann. i swear this is the first and last time i'm gonna step out of the house looking this untidy. very unproffesional. chey.

lesson learnt of course. i'm gonna turn in extra early tonight, get my alarm ringtone to be on its maximum, and get syahid and shahidah to give me somemore wakeup calls. haiyaaaaa.... i just cant wait for attachments to end mann. :( i miss schooling already. but hey, its friday already tmr. meaning syahid is gonna book out and i get to spend time with him again this weekend. weeeeeeeeeeeeeee. i so miss that botak boy.

2010-07-04T21:05:00.003+08:00

"The days with you are flying by

and i'm so glad that we're together

i never used to be like this

and everyday was just another

the day we met i never thought

that i would ever have your number

i wrote it in my diary

i have it in my head

you always try to do the things that make me happy

i always try to do the things that make you happy

the sun is shinning for us and it makes you happy

the stars are shinning for us and it makes me happy"

2010-07-04T10:29:00.006+08:00

this feeling, as if i've been pushed hard to the ground, as if gravity is not allowing me to stand again. it hurts, time after time again. always, finding myself in this situation, i have no idea why. as though i'm torn between 2 totally different world that are not allowing me to make any sound decision of my own. i have to stop getting carried away by others and start listening to my own heart, someone told me. but i dont understand myself sometimes. ego, this huge ego of mine is killing me, destroying everyone around me. these thoughts and doubts i carry, its getting me crazy. they are the cause of hasty decisions made which was a mistake. mistake, i've did countless times now haunting me down. feelings of regret sometimes so overpowering, causing me to feel ashamed of myself. ashamed of how i've been all along. how i've been covering up my flaws and faking up a strong front.

i always look into the mirror with questions running through my head. often, those question are left unanswered in the attempt of erasing them from my head. just like how you would rub away those fog from your window. thats me. i run away from problems. i'm afraid of being defeated, i'm afraid of getting constantly pinned down. acting as if everything is fine, thats how i manage to pull through. my life, the things i face day to day isnt as interesting as how you would have thought. its just mundane repetition of events that i'm so numb to. i yearn for something more, something more fascinating, something more appealing. but i guess, life isnt a fairytale, there isnt happy endings like how everyone would hope for. theres always ups and downs. you get thrown but you bounce back and get back up again.

i need a change. for now, i need strength to face 3 more weeks of attachments and many many hectic weeks to come with assignments and presentations due, examinations, and more attachments.

anyways, yesterday was good. as usual, spent the saturday with syahid. met his bunkmate, ibnu and gf, kina. it was raining, so we ended up playing pool at marina. watched a local band performance at esplanade's waterfront and there were fireworks to end up the day. (:

2010-06-30T20:29:00.004+08:00

dinner last night with the girls. finally!

thank god for afternoon shift tmr. i need my sleep badly. and, i miss you. :(

2010-06-29T21:26:00.001+08:00

Its been a year. (: happy 1st.

i love you.

2010-06-27T17:37:00.006+08:00

yesterday, i finally had a nice, proper date with the special one. cos you know, usually we'll be just roaming around without any proper plan. i was so excited to go expo for the Robinson's sale. already grabbed a few items but i changed my mind cos i was too lazy to queue. the crowd was woooooohooooooooo. i bet half the population of singaporeans were there. k. just kidding. i'll be suffocated if that happens. yesterday's crowd already i cannot tahan. there was so much to choose from. from anything, to everything. i can spend hours savouring those sales item if not for syahid dragging me around and yeah, the crowd that was giving me a hard time. so we left.

syahid was being his usual self. -______- headed down to tampiness for dinner. oh yea. wanted to get a pair of shoe for attachment back at expo. Clark's was selling at $75. i almost wanted to get it but si syahid ni die die say they're selling at a much cheaper price at tampiness's Isetan. i was very sure its cheaper at expo you know. when we finally reach isetan, guess how much they selling at? $79.90. -___- thanks eh.

had our dinner at seoul's garden. ate till we couldnt take in anymore. we didnt eat very much actually. tsk. kinda wasted. cos you know, we didnt plan before hand that we actually wanted to dine in there. if i know, from the night before already i never makan. skip breakfast, skip lunch sekali. then can makan macam babi. haha. kiasu.

Since our first year will be on this coming tuesday, i gave syhaid the scrapbook that i made for him yesterday. tersengih-sengih member bace. :DDDDD heeeeeeeeee. wow. time flies real fast huh. its been more than a year now. (:

we had fun testing my camera for its effects. was telling him how i want to go to the ERP gantry at town and take pictures of fast moving vehicles at night just like this one. gonna be very pretty!

hey love, i've survive 360 days being with you. i still want to go through the next 360 days, weeks and months together. i want to celebrate many many anniversaries with you even when our hair have turn gray, our teeth is starting to fall and when our face gets wrinkly. i want us to chase after our grandchildrens together and fall asleep on your chest everynight. i want all those things we fantasize about to come true. like travelling the world, just the 2 of us. i cant wait for the day, many many years to come. time flies, that i believe so. cos just so you know, right now, i love you for who you are and what i am when i'm with you. (:

oh damnn. attachments start tmr. :(( :(( :(( :(( i hope i survive 1 month of this. tsk. i'm gonna go and prepare my stuff for tmr and then maybe, just maybe i'll be a little excited for attachment. pffffft. at times like this, i wish i can have a fast foward remote control or smth. but i'm kinda looking foward for SHS actually. but wth. we havent even learn injection skills. how to practice on those kids? its really confusing how they plan this attachment thingy you know. our childbearing module was back during year 1, sem 1 and we're only going for pedriatrics and gynaecology on year 2, sem 2. as if we can remember what we've learn a year ago.

2010-06-25T18:30:00.002+08:00

I'm really really blessed to be in NR0918. Barbeque was fun with many many pictures taken. all pictures up at facebook. love you guys. (:

2010-06-23T20:36:00.003+08:00

Had a great time with this group of people at the zoo today. been planning to make an outing to the zoo since god knows when and we finally made it today! even though not all of 'us' came since our dear halif had to work. workaholic lah sangat itu anak. i thought i was late this morning since they plan to meet latest by 9.30am. woke up kinda late, and by the time i get ready all, it was close to 9.30 that i leave the house. kelam kabut member rush down to amkhub. check check only suzy and nurul was there. -______- this is what you call 'janji melayu'.

then while waiting for the bus, theres this bus driver who came up and tried communicating with us by saying "uh, eh, uh, uh, uh, uh" hahahhahaha. macam orang bisu! he was pointing to suzy and my camera, to a couple who was smooching away and back to our cameras. i think he was trying to tell us to snap some good pictures and post it up at stomp lah. tak ade kerje. -__- cikopek punya apek. haha. anyways, its been so long since i've been to the zoo. Not only we get to see our beloved relatives there, we also had a mini advanced birthday celebration for sabirah and herlina.

yayy. you guys turning 18 very very soon. :D my turn wait long long. yayyy. :( haha. HAPPY ADVANCED BIRTHDAY BABES! me love you all many many. the cookie's and cream cake was delicious. i think cos it tasted abit like oreo cheesecake. it started to rain a little when we were munching away on nuggets, epok-epok, french toast with sausage and more nuggets. but the rain cant be compared to the rain when we were at the kiddy area lah. we were stuck there for about 2 hours! we got bored of waiting for the rain to stop and decided to order KFC's family feast and makan AGAIN. yes. after waiting for more than an hour for the rain to stop, then we decided to makan. but the rain tak stop stop ni. we only make our way back when the rain wasnt so heavy.

haha. look at that face. "ma! hujan lebat ma! tadi pagi jemur kain, skarang basah!" hahahah.

k dah. theres class bbq tmr, and i cant wait! more pictures coming up people. ;)

and you know, its so true how if you're broke, waiting for the 25th macam freakin S.L.O.W. i hope $$ come in by tmr. preeeeeeeeeeeety pleeeeeeeeease. :( sucks when i only get my pay by the end of the holiday. so many plans, so broke. but on the brighter side, i'm going for robinson's sale at expo with syahid this saturday! whooooooopidup!

2010-06-20T17:23:00.003+08:00

this is not the first time that people mistook my age. not the very first time people thought i was 24. -___- do i look THAT old? oh mann. i cant imagine how i'll look when i'm 30. i'll look 10 years older by then! holy crapp. when i walk with syahid, people though i'm his elder sister. when i work in the ward, people thought i use to be an EN cos well, i look matured. when my mum's friend bump into me outside, they ask if i'm already married. i'm so used to their reaction, "you're not even 18 yet?? are you serious? you look 20!" i may not look my age, but i'm still very young at heart. :D

2010-06-19T21:34:00.004+08:00

i love you. (:

okay!then meet you after my appointment then((: shld nt be tht late(:

2010-06-19T12:21:00.001+08:00

haha. no problem!

Ask me anything

2010-06-18T22:35:00.002+08:00

while waiting for syahid to call me, i shall kill time to blog. :D just got back from meeting girlfriend zy for teh tarik and prata. i wont be able to sleep tonight. degil kan, nak minum teh jugak. cannot resist lah mahhh... teh tarik die... fuyoooh. oh yea. i didnt only drink teh tarik, but also crysenthemum (i dont know how to spell) tea. double zzzzzz! i make sure syahid temankan me till i fall asleep tonight. heh heh heh.

i didnt only meet zy today but also nurul earlier in the morning. plan was to go to the library and chop seats and plugs for our laptop but i havent had breakfast and we ended up at KFC. by the time we want to head down to the library, we're thinking twice already. confirm no seats, confirm so plugs. -____- soooooo, we just lepak at KFC and later at Mac's until both our laptop died on us. i so need a change of battery. not even 1/2 hr of use, mati already. tsk. camera rosak, laptop rosak, hp rosak. why lah why??

so whazz the plan tmr?? Gym and swimming with syahid! weeeeeeeee. i hope we're not too lazy to carry out our plan. cos you know, i'm such a lazy pig sometimes. semangat for exercising doesnt come very often.

last night (actually, this morning) i experience something creepy. i mean, its not always that i get to experience stuff like this. my dad just bought a vintage clock that will make that "ding dong" irritating sound every hour. i had a scary dream. in that dream, i was running away from something. i remember, i got scolded and i walked away but that 'someone' who scolded me turn into 'something' scary and tried to get hold of me. apa lagi, i run ah. and you know, in dreams, how fast you try to run, you just cant get any faster. cos i know if its for real, i would run so much faster than how i was running in that dream of mine. i would already sprint mann. i think for 2.4 km, if they put something scary to run after me, something like a dog or what, confirm my timing will be like never before. hahahaha. k. sidetrack.

back to the story, i woke up to the sound of the clock dingy dongy away at 3AM sharp! and i heard its from people that 3am in the morning is a harsh timing or what. and i was very very scared ok. you have no idea how i was holding on to my bolster and covering myself with my blanket even though it was freakin warm. to make things worst, i had to go to the toilet. i swear i broke the record of the shortest time i've been to the toilet mann. hahaha. cos you know, normally, i would spend forever. i can even fall asleep inside if i'm too sleepy. haha. crazy. no lah.

kk. my phone is rrrrrringing! adios.

meet earlyy okayys! i got ttsh apointment in the afternoonn

2010-06-18T22:32:00.001+08:00

nad say meet at 5 tau. she end school late. howiee??

Ask me anything

are we meeting on tuesday my darling?

2010-06-18T17:45:00.001+08:00

most probably yes! :DDDDD

Ask me anything

2010-06-16T21:32:00.003+08:00

ohmy ohmy. i miss my long straight hair. :(

why is your guy so irritating?huh?

2010-06-16T10:21:00.001+08:00

i think it is in his nature that he is irritating to a certain extent but i'm very sure he doesnt bug the hell out of you till you have to ask me through this way. Everyone has their irritating times. its just a matter if you can handle it or not. cos most of the time i know, he doesnt mean it. unless irritating in a certain unappropriate way, then you gotta tell me! ;)

Ask me anything

when shall we have ice creammmmmmmmmmmmmmm?

2010-06-16T10:17:00.001+08:00

ahah. very soon babe. that have to ask nad and fayydhah too when they'll be free. :D

Ask me anything

2010-06-15T15:42:00.002+08:00

Hi all. since i've got so much free time today, i decided to give this blog a new look. its been sometime since i feel this free with almost absolutely nothing to do. no plans, nothing. if syahid is not in camp, i think we'll be doing the normal stuff we do already. eat and eat and eat finding good food around singapore. i miss those times lah. when he was ever so free. always available, always there for me. now that he is away for good, i kinda realise we shouldnt take someone's presence for granted. especially someone so dear and close to your heart. (:

2010-06-14T17:59:00.002+08:00

And it's a good excuse to put love to use
Baby, I know what to doBaby,
I will love you
I'll love you, I'll love you

2010-06-14T16:42:00.002+08:00

My room is so much more spacious and of course, cleaner now. thanks to my lil brother and nurul for helping me out. :D now i just need to persuade my mum to get me a new bed hopefully by hari raya. baru semangat sikit want to decorate my room. thats when i shall call down my handy dandy assistant, shahidah to help me. heheh. muah!

2010-06-13T18:19:00.013+08:00

SHS Inagural Grad Nite was awesome bawesome to the max. it was worth all the last minute balloon pumping, blowing, tying and twisting for the decor. those who helped out with the decor had less than 1/2hr to get ready before the programme for the evening starts. 1/2hr for changing, make-ups and hairdo? no way. shahidah and i only came down like what? 1 1/2hrs after? hahaha.

everyone had fun. music was awesome. was one of the camera girl for the night but with the music and people dancing around us, shahidah, sarah and i decided to hit dancefloor too. and we danced away till our feet were sore. we were on heels mind you. ended up with blisters and a very very painful pair of legs.

i've got many many pictures to upload right now. slowly lah eh people. heart pain tau want to upload. the files so big. i would have even more pictures if not for me accidentally reformatting hafiz's SD card. ughh. sakit hati sia. it was already halfway through the event. i think i might have deleted 300 over pictures. -___- what a waste. but its ok, theres still other photographers. well well, what a way to end the term huh? its the holiday now!! weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee! like finally.

weekend was spent with syahid. watched Karate Kid with him, his bunk mates and their respective girlfriends. i think that movie is kinda average. but i think jaden smith will grow up to be a very charming man. gotta take a look at his body mann. those six packs. wohoooooo! hey, he is only what? 12?

roamed around town and did a little shopping with syahid before heading to al-adzhar for dinner with syahid's family. and the little one was there!

aha. cute little ari. love her eyes mann. its HUGE. you should see her other pictures at facebook. so cute!

alrighty. more pictures up at facebook. i'm gonna enjoy my holidays before its time for attachment. oh mann. some highlights for the holiday, Ice-cream with nad, fayyadhah and regnard, room makeover, the zoo trip with the clique, class bbq, camping with the boy and also not forgetting, to go for gym and swimming session with shahidah. :DDDDD. gonna make this holiday a worthwhile one. adios!

2010-06-09T22:25:00.002+08:00

href="http://www.ripway.com/">Free file hosting by Ripway.com

i love it when you sing to me on the phone love. (: this time, its a cover of Asthmara by Oh chentaku. pardon me cos its not very clear.

2010-06-08T22:03:00.002+08:00

Gosh. school is really draining me out. really looking forward to the end of this week. Hopefully grad nite will be a good one to end school with. gotta continue studying for PPR and biomedical science paper tmr. i'll do a proper update soon. havent been updating religiously lately. i know. buzzzy lah beb, buzzzzy. adios.

2010-06-05T21:42:00.002+08:00

"i feel like dancing in mid-air
i feel like floating in the sky."

lets make sure we plan our day ahead next time. i dont want to be planless and end up sitting in the middle of orchard watching and commenting on people who passes by again. -___-

Hey, where do you usually shop for your clothes? I like the way you dress yourself up. Casual yet sweet!

2010-06-04T21:18:00.001+08:00

haha. omg. i shop almost everywhere mann. i love going to flea markets and thrift stores. you can find really nice clothings if you search hard enough or if you're just lucky. and they're cheap too! i do shop at stores such as cotton on, F21, Zara, Fox, Topshop and Mango too. but i think i will always go for comfort and simplicity. (: nothing over the top quite very often. :D

Ask me anything

2010-06-04T20:21:00.001+08:00

Thank God Its Friday.

1 more week of school!

2010-06-03T19:23:00.002+08:00

i came to school this morning with almost zero knowlegde of statistics. its been about 2 years since i deal with numbers and all these mean, mode, median, probability shizz are long gone from my memory. and me being a lazy ass to attend statistic lectures and tutorial makes it even worst. but i really have to thank shahidah and everyone who have helped me in one way or another for this test. infact, everybody was helping everybody in a way. thats why my class is so awesome you see. (: was expecting to get at most a C grade but alhamdulillah, i manage to get a B.

Research method test tmr and i so gotta start studying now. another last minute study. good job ham. ZZZZZZZZZZZZ

where u working at? :)

2010-06-01T21:52:00.001+08:00

I'm not working sweets. just schooling. (:

Ask me anything

Who do you consider your close friends, in school and outside of school?

2010-06-01T21:46:00.001+08:00

hmmm. in school i do have a few close friends that i hangout with everyday. they are the ones i spent most of my time in school with in lectures, lunch, skipping lectures together, studying together and getting stressed out together. haha. i think theres a thin line between close friends and bestfriend. close friends are the one you spent most of your time with and having similarities that brings you guys closer. but a bestfriend knows you inside-out, outside-in. someone who dares to stop you when you're in the wrong but does hate you for being wrong. someone who would give you their truthful opinion but do not restrict your life. someone who would be there for you even though you guys stay miles apart. someone who you know you can fall onto when the time is tough. someone who dont have to ask cos he/she already know what you're facing with. i believe friends do come and go but the true ones stay with you all your life. (: thanks for reminding me this thing still exist. haha.

Ask me anything

2010-05-30T21:20:00.004+08:00

time past by so fast. its already monday and its back to school for most of us. i think i was enjoying my long weekend a little bit too much to even realise today is sunday. i seriously thought its a saturday today and refuse to wake up for madrasah untill the boy gave me a wake up call. its the last day of madrasah and i can finally have my sunday morning back for now at least till it reopen. which i dont know when also. -______-

i need to hit the gym or maybe go jogging very very soon looking at the amount and type of food i've been consuming these days. like how i was with syahid's family at Al-azhar for a very late dinner eating roti naan with butter chicken and kheema, fish and chips, beef steak and what nots. sumpah kenyang gila. but i tell you, the butter chicken was superb! boleh sampai termimpi mimpi k makan itu ayam. hahaha. i should've brought my camera lah yesterday. was all over singapore. from amk to bedok, to jurong point, to expo, to CCK, to bukit timah and back to amk finally. unplanned plans happened. initially the plan was to meet syahid for lunch and chill abit. but his family was over at expo for the mega sale and of course i didnt want to miss it. :D heh heh. orang punya lah ramai.... and you should see the queue mann. macam they queueing for ration like that. i'm having muscle cramps over at my arms now from carrying Ari around. so cute lah she. gerrrrrrram!

oh yes. its GSS right now and boy oh boy, too bad my budget is a little tight this month. if not, i'll be painting the town red already. i heard GSS is on for 2 months. ada chance lah next month ni macam. :DDDDD

2010-05-29T10:40:00.002+08:00

This post is specially for the boy. (:

Dear you,

I know i havent been the best girlfriend. I've got issues with my ego which seems as big as an elephant's ass. I'm always complaining to you all about my imperfections till you get sick and tired of it. I vent my anger at you when i'm too stressed out about school. I say nasty things and but know i dont mean it sometimes.

thanks for all the times you put up with my awesome bawesome behaviour, all the times you gave in to me cos you know i'm very good at sulking if you never give me any chance. heh heh. for all those times you hold me so tight when i wanted to get away cos i was so pissed at you. you didnt give up trying to contact me when i switch off my phone cos i was so angry at you. even if that means you were to go through my friends to get to me. i remember that night when you couldnt get to me, you ended up talking to my mum about what happen. thanks for reminding me over and over that i'm perfect to your eyes and how you keep telling me this, "you're even more beutiful inside" (:

i want to have many many children with you. i want to cook a storm with you and invite our parents over for dinner. i want you to pick me up from work and we will go to NTUC fairprice and shop for our daily necessities together. i want to send you off to work every day and you will kiss me on the forehead before you leave. i want to hear your heartbeat till i fall asleep and wake up with your arms around my waist. i want to hear your wishper against my ear first thing in the morning. i want to love you the same 20, 30, 40 years from now, or maybe even more.

happy 11th my love. (:

2010-05-26T21:31:00.002+08:00

I'm a happy girl today cos i pass my skills test! weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee! even though i got Grastrostomy feeding and Bladder washout, which are the 2 least skills i was preparing for, even though i had to piss ms tong for not getting my equiptment right, (i forgot to take the feeds lah actually), even though mdm aishah had to take me for the second skill, even though i took almost 1 hr in the lab, even though i was shaking and my mind almost went blank, the lecturers were nice enough to give me a pass.
Alhamdulillah. (:

2010-05-25T21:52:00.002+08:00

i shouldnt be here. skills assesment is tmr and i'm not prepared yet. theres so much thing on my mind right now and i dont know where to start.

well, i dont think you understand me at all. i've tried.

2010-05-24T21:03:00.004+08:00

Hey lil brother. today marks the day you turn 12. please please please grow up and stop being a bugger to me and to everyone else. no matter how annoyingly irritating that i feel like strangling you most of the time and punching your face everytime you make that ugly face to irritate me and how i feel like kicking your ass cos you like to disturb me when you know i'm hogging on to the phone, and how you would make my blood boil when you purposely turn the lights on and refuse to turn it off especially when you know i'm going to sleep and that i cant sleep with the lights on, you're still my flesh and blood, little pest brother. make mama and papa proud one day so that i can stand with you and say, "here's my awesome lil brother." (:

da ader orng tanyer kaw qn blom? hahaaaa.. -cinta

2010-05-23T21:02:00.001+08:00

haha. blm ah! tak gune ade ni bende. siape lah aku kan. :(

Ask me anything

2010-05-23T20:29:00.003+08:00

Me: Pa, i want to take bike license first ah. can?
My Mum&DAD: NO.
Me: i was just thinking since...
My Mum&Dad: NO.

haha. was just testing my parents. who knows they suddenly so nice and finally agreed on letting me get a bike license and my own bike. tsk. baru nak feeling feeling minah rempit. :(

2010-05-23T17:38:00.002+08:00

"i need a little more luck,

a little more time,

a little more hope,

a little more strength,

a little more courage,

a little more blessing,

a little more determination,

a little more support,

a little more trust,

and perhaps, a little more love."

2010-05-19T21:23:00.004+08:00

i'm pretty much very occupied these days. i think everyone is at this point of time. i cant even find the right time to meet up for ice-cream with nad, regnard and fayyadhah. how sad. :( its either our free time clashes or we cant make it at all. buzzzzzzy people.

done with nursing lab theory test today. pheww... at least i can concentrate on the 6 other skills that is gonna be tested in 1 week's time.

well, i'll just have to keep on reminding myself that time flies time flies time flies time flies. oh godd.

hey, time really flies mann. lunch time with rajes, fiza and shahidah was funny today. we were talking about our primary school and secondary school times. the kental days. zaman socks rolling rolling, skirt folding folding, all those times spent during detention. it was so ironic for me cos i was a prefect back then during secondary school. but i was serving detention when i was suppose to do detention duty, i came late and join the latecoming crowd when i was supose to be doing my morning duty catching latecomers and i even get caught for improper attire during attire spotcheck. ankle socks, it was such a big deal you know. tak cool tak pakai ankle socks. haha. its really a wonder how i can even get the certificate of service from the prefectorial board at the end of sec 4. goodtimes. (: and i remember how i hated PE so damn much. me and nad would find every way to escape from mdm foong during PE. haha. well, we were young and free. :D

2010-05-17T21:17:00.002+08:00

I'm happy with how things are going right now. even though school is getting hard on me. Things that happen makes me believe even more that if you have an open mind and accept everything positively, you'll be contented at the end of the day. this reminds me of the video i was watching a few weeks back. something about the law of attraction. maybe some of you may have seen it before. it was saying how if you go about facing your daily lives with a positive mind, you'll create this positive aura around you which eventually will atract positive things. so i guess thats how some people are much popular than the others? i'm not saying that in order to be popular or whatsoever. its just how we handle things in life you see. through just changing our perception, we can change a nasty situation into something beautiful. (: i feel so positive today. despite being late for school and getting splashed by some auntie's wet umbrella while boarding the bus and getting some more splash of water in the toilet, cos you see, some people just have this habit of flicking their hands after washing them. dont even want to say sorry. you stare at them, they'll stare at you back. as if you're at fault like that. -__- for god's sake. theres a freakin handryer and plenty of tissues around. even though some people like shahidah take advantage of hand dryer for HAIR dryer. haha. ;)

hurray for elearning tmr! i bet i wont bother to open up CMS and see whats for elearning. more time to sleep. yayy. since i think i will have trouble sleeping tonight due to the redbull i had this morning and home-made green tea i drank earlier this evening. good job ham. :D

2010-05-16T18:28:00.002+08:00

heheh. cute kaaaaaaaaan si botak ni! haha. cant stop touching his head mann. macam grass carpet like that. :DDDD so cute lah. was grinning like crazy the moment i saw him yesterday. sumpah macam small boy. but time flies too fast. you're already on your way back to camp now. :(

i shall see you next weekend again my love.

2010-05-15T22:16:00.003+08:00

"some people learn to dance, others are born with it"

i wonder when it is showing here in singapore. i'm a big fan of step up sequels. soooooooooooo gonna catch it!

2010-05-13T17:40:00.006+08:00

Sometimes i wonder if we'll stay this strong in time to come. Will those three words lose it's meaning one day? If the time comes that i dont cross your mind anymore. When we suddenly become someone whom we never thought we will be. If we are apart one day despite how close we are right now. Acting as if we dont know each other at all. If our feelings isnt that strong to hold on to anymore. When everything we hope for seems so out of reach. And we dont even bother what's happening in each other's life. When we're selfish enough to let go what we've been holding on all along. All the promises made to build our future together. When it comes to a point where we are not able to achieve what we want at this very moment. I'm not going to hope too much cos i'm afraid of major dissapointment. Dont fly to high they say, or you might fall. But i cant help but to think, if i'm not where i am standing right now, where would i be?

2010-05-13T15:51:00.002+08:00

Thank God Its Friday. Really.

2010-05-12T20:54:00.002+08:00

these pretty girls including my other classmates are the reason why i'm still having the drive to go to school. even though i go home with almost no energy left everyday. i need a massage. i should have thought of getting a lighter laptop before. shoulder, pack pain. tsk. macam old lady. my mum so cute. she was asking me where i was going in the morning with a big bagpack. just because i didnt use that bag for awhile, she thought i was going to run away from home or smth. haha

and and and, my mum has been accusing me of dieting. Ex-Cuseeeeee Me. me and dieting can never go together. she dont know how i eat like a pig in school. the only reason why i dont really eat much at home is cos i munch junks alot in school. and by the time i get home, its either i'm too tired to eat or i'm too full. cos you know when i eat, i wont be sleepy, and when i'm not sleepy, i will sleep late, and when i sleep late, i will wake up late, and when i wake up late, i wont have extra time to do my hair and therefore, will be late for school. its a very vicious cycle you see. :D

i'm listening to cant fight the moonlight by leann rimes. wth. suddenly all the old songs sound so nice now. sarah, shahidah and i was singing old songs happily otw home earlier. songs like stronger by britney spears, lose my breath by destiny's child and even i will survive by gloria gaynor. haha. wth lah wth...

2010-05-11T21:09:00.002+08:00

My hair is falling at a very scary rate. i better do something before i turn bald mann. go for beijing 101 or something. tsk. even washing my hair now is a nightmare cos by the end of my shower, the toilet's drain will be clogged with strands of my hair. as if i'm undergoing chemotherapy or something. eh. its really that bad ok. my scalp serum also like not working like that. maybe school is one of the reason why my hair is literally falling so freely. many many things on my 'to-do-list' right now mann. i dont even know where to start!

look at this,

week 5 (which is next week btw) theres Nursing lab Theory Test. have to make sure i study inside-out, outside-in for this since Nursing Lab credits are increased to 14 credits this time.

week 6, Nursing Lab Skills test will start. This is very stressful cos any topic from NG tube insertion, Gastric lavage, Urinary Catheterisation, and Gastrostomy&Jejunostomy will be tested. and again, it has the highest credit.

Week 7, theres Statistic and Research Method online test. This is again very very stressful cos i know nuts about them statistics and research Med. ask me what i've been doing in those 2 lectures. dozing off most of the time i guess? and oh. busy surfing facebook through my itouch. hah. how like that?

Week 8. Will be having the most hectic week. I wonder how i'll survive through this. Theres Adult Nursing Presentation, Health Psychology Presentation, Health Psycho 300 words essay, HMSPPR test, and Biology Practical. i think by the end of this week, i'll be crawling back home already.

apart from all these test, assignments and what nots, attachment will start again on the 23rd of june for a month. this time at general ward again. -___- so, tell me why do i hear people telling me nursing is an easy breezy course? bloody hell.

theres so many things on my mind right now and i dont know where to start. maybe i should start prioritising my work from now on. and boy oh boy. i miss you so damn much mann. cant wait to see you again this weekend. lets watch IP man. muahahaha. ya ya. like i have all the time in the world like that. but its ok, for you i'll sacrifice a day. chey wahhh. ;)

Hey ham. You look good with that curly hair

2010-05-09T09:35:00.001+08:00

Hey. Thanks! I just hope my curls can be more defined and not so dry right now. Very tedious to manage this hair you know. Haha.

Ask me anything

2010-05-08T21:59:00.001+08:00

I love you mama.

Happy mothers' day.

2010-05-08T20:58:00.003+08:00

"you're so grown up now. even your voice sound different. i'm sure you already have a boyfriend."

"boyfriend? haha. i'm getting married soon lah uncle?"

"really?! why wasnt i told?"

"hahahahha. i'm barely 18 yet."

"but you know, kids these days..."

hahaha. thats my favourite uncle from indonesia who called today. when i was a young girl, he was the one who took care of me, the one who watch me grow till the time i was brought into singapore. i was closer to him than i was with my own dad. he was saying how i'm growing so fast and how we cant get to meet even if i were to go back to indonesia now cos he is always out of the country. according to him, he wont be surprise if the next time he sees me, i will be carrying my own son/daughter. haha. wth. not so soon lah of course.

2010-05-07T21:23:00.004+08:00

"i miss you just like the air i breathe."

2010-05-06T20:37:00.004+08:00

i'm so so blessed to be in NR0918 ya know. the most random and kecoh classmates i ever had. like how we were having mass conversation during statistic class when we're suppose to learn how to use the SPSS software. i think only group 18 was so busy sharing our thoughts and feelings about the class through MSN chat. deciding where we should eat for lunch lah and how the lecturer looks kinda gay and somehow reminds fieza of a penguin in a batman's suit. -__-. wth lah... hahaha. even though our class is getting smaller now due to some fallouts along the way. i'm looking foward to more class outing. like what rajes mention earlier today that we'll be spending a night at kampung hut at sentosa for the 2week's break. weeeeeeeeeee! so exciting! and our plans for zookout this year. i know. still very long to way to go before the event. tapi dengan semangat yang sungguh kental ini, siang siang dah plan. haha. :D i love my classmates. mwah!

anyways, school is getting real hectic these days. especially since theres events like parents seminar, debate, sports fiesta and graduation night all around the corner. at least all these more or less can keep me busy enough and get me distracted. cos you know, when i'm alone and lonely with nothing to do and no one around, many many things can play around in my mind. boleh jadi gila i tell you.

i think syahid is having so much fun in camp. dah macam holiday like that. everything free some more. -__-

2010-05-06T20:34:00.000+08:00

Just like a star across my sky,

Just like an angel off the page,

You have appeared to my life,

Feel like I'll never be the same,

Just like a song in my heart,

Just like oil on my hands.

2010-05-04T19:39:00.002+08:00

I guess reality only hits me this morning after you made the last phonecall. All those time when you cried silently when you're with me, i was always the one to assure you that everything is going to be alright, that we're going to pull this tough time together and that nothing else matter except you. i was the one who hug you and you cried harder on my shoulders. i was the one who wipe away your tears and made you smile again. you were so afraid, so afraid of losing me. afraid that situation might change and we'll never be the same again. but all those while, i was so sure that i am strong enough to handle this. i guess those feelings doesnt really sink into me until today. until i realise that you're really gone. i never knew i could miss you this much. and i never knew my tears could flow ever so freely today. its so true how they say you wont know how much you treasure him until he is gone. :( please make this 2 weeks a fast one cos i have never been apart from you this long before. and what sucks even more is that its so difficult to contact you now. i dont even know if you'll call me tonight. :((

some of you might think that i'm such a whiny ass cos its only 2 weeks that my bf will be in camp before he books out and that his camp is still in singapore bla bla bla shitz. but hey, syahid and i, we're so close mann. god knows how i feel right now. :(

2010-05-03T21:21:00.001+08:00

Goodbye my love, I'll see you soon. :(

2010-05-01T23:35:00.002+08:00

i think i'm in love with her. maybe the only reason why i would want to watch iron man 2 for the second time is cos of her. love her hair in the movie. yummy.

my nose is running, my throat is itching, my head is spinning. i had a long day and i shall turn in now. oh wait. i'm watching susuk actually. wth. haha

2010-04-29T20:33:00.003+08:00

"For all those times you stood by me
For all the truth that you made me see
For all the joy you brought to my life
For all the wrong that you made right
For every dream you made come true
For all the love I found in you"

I love You.

2010-04-28T21:00:00.005+08:00

this is for those of you who have yet to see my fantabulosocurlywurly hair. i swear managing permed hair is such a pain in the ass. got syahid to wake me up at 8am this morning when class only starts at 11am so that i can wash my hair. shampoo lain, conditioner lain, my scalp therapy serum lain, sculpting mouse lain, curling cream lain, hair serum lain. -____- only done with blow drying and everything after and hour. mak kauuuuu. i realise i already spent quite alot just on my hair you. rebond lah curl lah. with all the countless hair products. anything to look presentable mann. hahaha.

and i'm excited to get the role as sub-photographer for SHS Academic Club. weeeeeeeee. at least i can put my camera to good use. :D and of course. slowly learn and build my photography skills. ;)

what happen if some guy want you to be his BF knowing that u love Ur current BF?

2010-04-26T20:58:00.001+08:00

YOU DONT THINK I DONT KNOW WHERE THIS QUESTION COME FROM! hahahaha. -___- hmmmm... love. think love can be overrated sometimes. you may say it 1001 times a day but if you dont feel it with your heart whats the point? its like saying without any actions. if only theres better words then love to express your overwhelming affection cos the word 'love' has been use over extensively. it all depends on yourself too. how you define love that is. For me, as long as i am still convinced you are my future, you are the one theres nothing that can change my mind. we've been through so much and it'll be a waste to give up just like that. like what often said, troubles and problems along the way are just like hurdles that we need to face with an open mind. and to answer you question, any guy with the right mind wont do that otherwise he is psychotic or just plain womanizer? yeaaaaaaaaah. thats what i think yo.

Ask me anything

2010-04-25T14:05:00.002+08:00

syahid was telling me that my hair now reminds him of the movie grease. the female actress in the movie to be more exact. so i tried googling it up and i found this picture of Olivia Newton-John from Grease with her gorgeous curls. haha. i've got no comments. :DDDDD

i'm beginning to like my new hair despite the shock i had yesterday to find my hair so volumised. its been so long since my hair was that errr... big. all i need now is some colour. maybe soon. (:

2010-04-24T22:05:00.002+08:00

Kick-ass is a must watch movie! i swear its damn gooooooooood. went to watch it with syahid and his cousins after school yesterday. it was a friday and i ended at freakin 5pm. sakit hati siol. :/ was already telling myself, confirm i sleep later while watching the movie. but hey it was so moving till i had to hold my pee cos i dont want to miss anything. hahaha. so not like me lah. i dont usually go for action packed movies like this. but this one really got me. :D

i'm so shagged right now cos i've been out the whole day. rushed my brother to KK hospital in the morning cos his temperature was scarily reaching 39.9C. and went to do my hair after that accompanied by syahid and shahidah. my hair is so boooooomzz right now.

and why is blogger not letting me align my pictures to the centre now? it looks nice before. but i dont think it still look nice now. so weird. k. whatever. i need sleep mann.

how long have u been with ur bf?

2010-04-21T21:17:00.001+08:00

for as long as i can remember? haha. to be exact, 10months? around there. but its more than a year alr that we got to know each other. It sure do feel like i've known him for a very very long time. and FYI, we dont really have this official monthsary thingy shitz. maybe anniversary yess. :D hopefully lah eh.

Ask me anything

2010-04-20T19:56:00.002+08:00

i dont know why blogger is not allowing me to move my picture to the center of the page but anywooos, it still look nice this way. :D oh gosh. my neighbour talks as if she owns the whole block like that. takde kuat lagi ke? macam pakai loudhaler like that. and i swear she talks like a train. irritating mann. and she always have this habit of screaming and shouting vulgarities in the middle of the night to her cat! ohmeegosh. sometimes i think she's abit not right in the brain. the cat also malas nak layan. so sad get owner gila like her.

its second day of school today and i must say i'm lovin it. despite the long hours that i have to spend in school. and one of my lecturer macam tigress! i come late 1 minute for tutorial and she's alr pouncing on me. lagi lagi i was using slippers today. but shes funny lah. especially when she took out the hand clap clap thing to quieten down the class. cant stop laughing mann. haha.

i'm hungry like zzzzzzz right now and i better go have my dinner. been eating alot these days ya know. tsk. but what the hell. gotta exercise more to increase my metabolism rate so no matter how much i eat, i wont grow FAT. muahahahaha. something i learn in bio today. and oh ya. i'm loving bio lectures. Dr Raj is one awesome lecturer. :DDDDD but the fact that bio credits dropped from 7credits to 3credits now sucks. :( heard its 14 credits for clinical? oh my gaaaaaaaaaaaay!

2010-04-19T19:02:00.003+08:00

Dear You,

I want to tell you how i'm feeling right now since i've been keeping it within me cos i was very sure things will take its turn. But it dont seem very likely now. No, i'm not gonna say you've change cos i know i've change too, for the better. maybe its just the way things are right now that we are this way. or maybe i assume its plain jealousy. but hey, what is there to be jealous about? i'm just any other ordinary girl who is working very hard towards her goals, towards her dreams, for her own future. the future might seem very vague right now looking that we're still young. but somehow, everything i do seems not right to your eyes. and its ironic since i was the one who stood by you through the tough times. i NEVER objected your decisions. rather, i supported you even though it hurts for me sometimes. now that someone else walks into your life, you turn your back against me. you talk about me behind my back. you fake yourself infront of me. you talk to me as if i do not have this sense of hurt. i kept quiet, i've been keeping quiet all these while. well, you might think i'm too caught up with myself to notice but hey, everyone has feelings. not only you. you say i'm very self-centered. but who is the real egoist now? well, you wanna know what i think about you now? i think you're so fake, you're so fake to even realise what the real problem is. you dont like me, you tell me straight to my face. dont worry, i'm strong enough to handle it. dont have to go about being two-faced when i know that heart of yours isnt sincere. thanks for all the times you've gone through shits with me. thanks for all those times you screamed at me when i was at my lowest. i just want to tell you that you have no right to hate me just cos the way i'm living my life right now doesnt suit you. cos afterall its my choice, its my life and i have not done anything to bother yours. have a piece of my mind. i dont live to please others.

2010-04-18T19:01:00.003+08:00

i cant believe its back to school tmr. i cant believe almost 2 months of vacation have passed by. i cant believe i'm already in year 2! oh gosh. time flies real fast these days. before you know it, i'm already staff nurse hamimah. ehemm. ;) i'm glad my holiday was a fruitful one. with attachments, shopping and more shopping, spending time with my girlfriends, family and of course, my selenger boyfriend here. talking about him, its gonna be less than 3 weeks time before he gotta go serve the nation. cant wait to see him turn into a MAN. lets make use of the time left now before you masuk kandang! muahahahaha. just kidding. you know i'll miss you right. :D

anywayzzzz, timetable for school suck ballz. really. its 8am all the way to 6pm for me every tuesday now. and no more dressy dressy friday like how we use to since friday classes always end extra early. you know, feeling feeling glamour lah sikit TGIF. haha. now that my wardrobe is new and tidy, got semangat lah sikit want to find clothes for school. and whoever agrees with me, you guys are brilliant. choosing your outfit for school can be very stressful right?. like how shafeeq say its more stressful for girls to spend hours matching their outfits with shoes and bags and accesories than it is for them to study. -__- merepek sangat. i still remember how he translated directly from a malay idiom cos he want to say it to kamini. "step ant, ant never die" hahaha. in malay, its "pijak semut, semut tak mati." i also dont know what it means but the direct translation means nothing. seriously. haha. kecoh.

as much as i cant wait to get back to school, i cant bear the upcoming stress of ICA's, presentations, clinicals and what nots either. its year 2 baby. gotta buck up and work my ass to improve my GPA. oh ya, theres another 1 month clinical in June. ohmygaaaaaaaay. and i heard PRCP for my batch is increased to 6months! mak kau....

my dad just ordered KFC family feast and its on its way right now. baru semalam i eat KFC with syahid. chicken face betul. oh oh. i finally got my egg tart from KFC today with fayyadhah after craving it for so long. its finger lickin gooooooood!

2010-04-17T19:22:00.003+08:00

i find the weather these days very weird. freakin hot and sunny in the morning and afternoon and but will rain heavily with lightning and thunder in the evening. but still, thank god theres rain cos i cant stand the scorching sun. like how i was sweating profusely when i was just walking on my normal pace from my house to the bus stop. benci.

i saw an SBS bus crashed into a bus stop earlier today. what a horrendous accident. mabuk apa itu driver? and just a few metres away from the bus stop theres another car-taxi accident. no wonder the traffic was super duper slow just now. was cracking my brain why the hell there was a traffic jam in the middle of a saturday afternoon. -___- i wonder what happen to all the passengers on board that bus. scary sia. macam final destination like that. must watch news tonight!

do you love your boyfriend?.

2010-04-16T21:14:00.001+08:00

i love my boyfriend like how i love my strawberry milkshake topped with fresh strawberries, like how i love rainy and stormy weathers with its strong wind, like how i love snuggling under my favourite blanket when its cold and like how i love the chocolate and butter waffle at school's macdonald's. hahaha.

you dont think i dont know who you are! you dont to ask me through formspring to know i love you, very much. mwah!

Ask me anything

2010-04-16T20:42:00.002+08:00

i went swimming with syahid today and we were such a noob. the lockers we wanted to use were computerised and it was our first time using it. the other day when i was went swimming with shahidah, she was the one who handled the locker so i had no idea how to operate it at all. padahal easy peasy sneezy weezy. hah.

so the first problem we encountered was that we didnt have exact change for the locker. its $0.40 per hour btw. after asking around for change, someone told us that the machine will give back our change if we dont give it the exact amount. we put in 50cents but no change was given. we thought since its only 10cents, nevermind lah. and i happily went to lock the locker without realising that syahid still had his shirt on and we both still had our slippers on. -___- so slenger nak mampus i tell you.

so we had to unlock the locker and pay AGAIN. by then we had no more coins so i had to change my $$ with this one uncle who looked like he was trying to run away from me when i approached him. like i some salesperson in swimming costume like that. he gave me 2 $1 coins for a $2 note change. and this time the machine happily take my $1 coin without change again! what a tragedy. next time pakai manual lockers sudah.

and i think its the gazzilionth time i tried uploading the orientation pictures to facebook. always fail me halfway. macam zzzzzzzzzz.

2010-04-14T20:58:00.003+08:00

its incredible how i manage to pull through 12hours of orientation despite only having 2hrs of sleep last night. Red bull really works huh. so gonna crash now.

is your name hamimah bte abdul hamid?

2010-04-14T20:53:00.001+08:00

err. yeah. haha.

Ask me anything

Are you a mixed blood?

2010-04-13T20:50:00.001+08:00

you can say that.(: but no arab blood like how people thought i have. haha

Ask me anything

formspring.me

2010-04-12T20:17:00.001+08:00

Ask me anything http://formspring.me/hammymah

2010-04-10T18:18:00.003+08:00

"all these while when you leave me alone, have you ever think about how i feel? i may appear so fine when the fact is that nobody knows what is going on inside this mind, inside this heart. it changes you so bad. you've changed. i want the old you back, whom i can think about, knowing you'll be right there for me. bloody hell, i feel so used"

i think i can break someone's face right now. Fcuk PMS.

2010-04-09T21:02:00.002+08:00

"I guess it's gonna have to hurt,
I guess I'm gonna have to cry,
And let go of some things I've loved,
To get to the other side,
I guess it's gonna break me down,
Like falling when you try to fly,
It's sad,
but sometimes moving on with the rest of your life,
Starts with goodbye."

gosh. i love her songs. i think they are very very meaningful.

and lets toast to the end of attachments! weeeeeeeee! i'm a free woman now. err, for the weekends at least. haha.

2010-04-08T20:22:00.002+08:00

i'm feeling so lousy right now. last day of attachment tmr and i have to fall sick. been going in and out of the toilet god knows how many times already and my stomach feels like its doing some stunts in there. i'm so tired. so tired of being so naive in believing everythings gonna be alright, that nothing is going to change cos just so you know, i've stop hoping, i've stop pretending. and i realise that your ways are not going to affect me anymore. i'm stronger than you think i am.

there it goes again. i need the toilet.

2010-04-04T21:24:00.003+08:00

i had a hell of a good time today with my angels. finally got to meet amrit and nadirah after so long. :D and they havent change alright. still the same old spontaneous, random and horny bitches that i know. hahaha.

oh. there was another flea market at scape. but wasnt into the mood since it was freakin warm and their stuff was abit more pricey as compared to the one at tanglim mall.

we sat at scape and drank coconut juice. was so craving for it. haha took some videos. i'll try uploading some of the "better" one if i can later. if you know what i mean. hehe. ;)

oh yes. syahid and irfan was somewhere around town too and they decided to drop by scape since the boy was on his way to work.

and then amrit nah and i headed to beach road to have satay and honey chicken wings! yummy. :D ok. i'm gonna try to upload the video now. and the rest of them pictures, i'll upload them to facebook alright. gooday!

2010-04-04T08:20:00.009+08:00

i have so many pictures to upload by now. i finally got to meet with nah and amrit today. yipeee! :D shall blog about it later. went out with shahidah supposedly to discuss and chop chop finish up on our case study yesterday. but we ended doing many many other things other than case study. haha. only spent like what? 1/2hr discussing on it? that one also never finish. tsk. how like this? -__-

we went to little india since i wanted to do my eyebrow threading. had masala thosai for lunch and its bloody cheap i tell you. 2 masala thosai with ice lemon tea and teh tarik only cost us $6.50! can you believe that? no. i cant. haha. next time if i'm broke, i'll just end up eating there. their thosai kosong must be even cheaper! was telling shahidah she shouldnt miss out the teh tarik there and yeah she regretted not getting it after taking a sip from my cup. ;)

after my threading which was very fast and cheap, we went in search for a place to settle down and start our case study. headed to orchard. you know, girls at at town, with no place to settle down, we ended up roaming around ion. haha. and i got a brilliant idea of going to tanglin mall cos i know they were having flea market yesterday. heheh. ;)

lucky us there was plenty of space at starbucks. dropped by atz at tanglin. oh gosh, i sure do miss working especially wrapping gifts. reminds me of the hectic christmas periods. ended up with paper cuts, backache due to the 12hr work!??

and then, of course. the flea market! yummmmmmmmeh. we went bonkers searching for good items. well, we learnt smth. next time go flea market, make sure not to wear short dress/skirt. kinda limit your movements you know. want to korek for treasures also susah. haha. anyways, i got myself a lovely shoe. macam love at first sight lah gitu. and it was CHEAAAAAAAAAP ok!

btw, dont mind the time reflected on this post. was actually blogging in the morning yesterday while waiting for fayyadhah to get ready for madrasah.

2010-04-01T22:58:00.002+08:00

today, a patient got me inspired. makes me realise that in life, nothing is easy but giving up isnt the choice. he still goes on with life independently even though he suffers from cerebral palsy since young. since then, he has been living all by himself. its really a wonder how someone like him can be so optimistic. "life is not easy, but dont give up" thats what he said repeatedly today. almost got me teary eyed listening to his life story cos i've never seen anyone like him before. such an eye-opener. things like this makes me thank god for choosing this path for me.

2010-03-31T20:42:00.002+08:00

"tears are words the heart cant express"

2010-03-31T17:18:00.002+08:00

yes. exactly how i'm feeling right now.

i want to be back to school. :(

attachments please be over sooooooooooon.

cos my legs are begging me for mercy already.

and and and %*#@$^(%$# case study!

soaking my feet in a warm tub of water and lavender scented soap sounds good now.

2010-03-30T17:28:00.000+08:00

hahahahahaha.

2010-03-29T19:11:00.003+08:00

I love how you would grab me from the back and hold me by the waist when we're in crowded places.

I love how you would stare at me when you thought i wasnt noticing.

I love how your hand will grab mine when we're walking.

I love the fact that i cant stay mad at you for too long.

I love how you can get so mature in your thinking making me question myself sometimes, "how old are you exactly?"

I love how i can feel so insecure yet so convinced at the same time.

I love knowing you miss me even though it was just a few minutes when we parted.

I love how we can go on and on about the future as we are so sure this is what we want all along from the start.

I love how you dont get tired of saying how much you love me.

I love the names that we came out for our little ones. such as Ariel Adinda Adriana for a girl and Hazriel Adri Hanandi for a boy. :D:D:D:D

I love how you get so panic when i ignore your calls and text messages.

I love the fact that you can read me like a book, knowing almost everything about me.

I love how you will put me to sleep almost every night even though sometimes you would just knock out while waiting.

I love how you would call me for no reason at all just to hear my voice.

I love your determination in whatever you're aiming for right now.

I love how you dont get tired of listening to my complains.

I love how when you get mad, i will pretend to get upset too and you'll end up cheering me up.

I love those goodbye kisses you give me as if i'm gonna be apart from you for a very very long time.

I love the fact that even though you are at the other end of the island, it still feel so near.

I love how we would laugh like mad kiddos at our own jokes.

I love how you keep bugging me when you sense there is something on my mind.

I love how you would pull me from my favourite shops and hold me tight to restrain me from getting too carried away from all those sales and what not.

I love knowing that you will always be behind me, supporting me in my life, in my career.

I love how you get so annoyed when i start explaining to you about things related to nursing but i know you still listen and get amazed by them. heheh.

I love how i can get so irritated by your rational talks and inspirational quotes you picked up from god knows where.

i love how you will practice you network marketing speech on me. sumpah it can get very irritating at some point. -__-

I love how i'm so convinced that you're the one, that you are my future. (:

gosh. i can go on and on listing more. i'm very tired right now and this weather makes me feel like hiding under my comforter and zzzzzzz all the way. morning shift tmr. lagi zzzzzzzz. time pass by so slowly when we're in the ward. benci.

Happy 9th my love. :D

2010-03-28T21:37:00.002+08:00

i'mma happy girl now cos i just went on a shopping spree earlier on today. :DDDDD and finally, after so long, i get to spend quality time with the dear boy. i'm so lazy to upload all those pictures one by one so compiling them is still the best idea. i'm tired like zzzzzzzzz already so let the pictures do the talking alright.

so basically, met syahid at bugis, shopped, walked to arab street, action jadi tourist, met hanafi and mira, trained to town and shopped some more. anyway, i realise that i keep on spending on tops and more tops and i need more bottoms now. tsk. all because i'm bottom-heavy and most of the bottoms i like either dont have my size or i just dont like how it look on me. easy said, bontot besar lah. haha. :P

attachment at SGH starts tmr. aiyaiyaiyaiyai. goodnight earthlings.

2010-03-27T21:33:00.000+08:00

hahaha. that was yesterday in developmental assesment and immunisation room. :D:D:D:D

2010-03-27T21:15:00.003+08:00

I was counting on forever,

now I'll never know

I can't even breathe

It's like I'm looking from a distance

Standing in the background